Living Outside The Lines: Little Miss Sassy Britches

Brittany had resting b#@*h face mastered before it was even a thing. Strangers at the mall, or grocery store, always tried coaxing a smile out of her, but…

Becky J Miller | Exclusive to Corridor News

Brittany Rebecca or Bree for short entered the world with a vengeance on July 24, 1994.

So anxious was she to make her appearance that she arrived faster than the doctors expected, giving everyone a scare. She recovered from her traumatic birth quite quickly and set about mastering the art of keeping her parents on their toes.    

To say that Brittany was our stubborn child would be like saying Krispy Kreme doughnuts taste best when the “Hot Out of the Oven” sign is on. Well, duh.  Signs of her stubbornness manifested early. 

There was her refusal to sleep during the hours of 11PM – 2AM, preferring instead to scream. Or her need to always be right next to someone.

If Bree was having tummy time on her blanket, Mommy couldn’t be nearby on the couch. Nope, Mommy had to be on the floor right next to her.

When she was four months old, I took a seasonal job that kept me away for three – four hours several evenings a week. Do you think Bree would drink a bottle during that time? Negative. She starved herself until I arrived home to nurse her. 

My excitement over having a daughter was so great, by the time she arrived on the planet, Brittany’s wardrobe was already more extensive than my own.

Never mind that we rarely left the house, that baby was clothed in frilly dresses with matching bloomers and lacey socks every…single…day. 

At the time she was too young to share her distress over Mommy’s choice of her wardrobe, but boy that changed dramatically by about age 3.

We began entering her in local beauty pageants. She loved the pageants themselves, but the sight of a pageant dress was an automatic tear trigger. 

“They’re itchy,” she proclaimed. Desiring to ensure her comfort and happiness, her daddy lovingly ripped one his undershirts to shreds, sewing swatches of the soft cotton into the dresses, covering the irritating seams. Pure magic.

Her older brother took naps religiously, every afternoon right after lunch. Do you think Little Miss Sassy Britches could follow in his footsteps? You’re catching on now, huh? Absolutely not.

This precious little brown eyed girl who sucked her thumb and carried her favorite Puffalump zebra everywhere would…NOT…nap. Nightly bedtime was not an issue, but naps were not happening.

Brittany had resting b#@*h face mastered before it was even a thing. Strangers at the mall, or grocery store, always tried coaxing a smile out of her, but she wanted no part of that nonsense.

No matter what they said or did, she sat statue still, thumb in mouth, dead stare. Not once did she crack a smile. 

From her first breath, baby girl had her daddy wrapped around her little finger. Nothing has changed.

She’s a grown woman, with a master’s degree, working for one of the top five accounting firms in the country, CFO of a non-profit missions organization, whose daddy drives three hours one way to pick up her two dogs when she’s away on business. 

Even though she prefers weight lifting to running, she willingly joins us for 5K’s whenever we have a run near her.

She has an uncanny knack for knowing whenever we are planning to be in town and loves to join us for dinner, a movie or any other adventure.

That strong-willed little girl blossomed into a compassionate, driven, dedicated, thoughtful, smart, accomplished woman with a gorgeous smile. Happy Birthday to our beautiful bouncing baby girl! 

Until Next Time,
Becky J Miller
“Warrior Princess”

Becky J Miller is a contributor and is exclusive to SM Corridor News. You can read more of Becky’s columns in Lifestyle.