Living Outside The Lines: “Oh the Horror!”

As a teenage girl, slumber parties were all the rage. More often than not, someone always decided watching a horror movie would be fun.

by, Becky j Miller

Google “movie genres” and up pops a list that includes: Horror, Action, Western, Adventure, Thriller, Documentary, Animation, War, Fiction, Romantic Comedy, Music, Science Fiction, Romance, Historical Period Drama, Fantasy, Chick Flick, Indy, Family plus a whole lot more.

Personally, I love a good chick flick or romantic comedy. Action, historical drama and maybe fantasy are tolerable, but the one category I absolutely refuse to watch, ever: HORROR!  

I know there are folks who LOVE horror movies, but I am not one of them. Scary movies turn me into a quivering six-year-old who is afraid of the dark and needs her mommy just to go into the bathroom. Laugh if you must, I won’t be offended. 

As a teenage girl, slumber parties were all the rage. More often than not, someone always decided watching a horror movie would be fun. Peer pressure dictates you are never the naysayer, and since falling asleep guaranteed frozen underwear, what’s a girl to do besides play along? My unwillingness to speak up resulted in exposure to Freddy of Elm Street, Friday the 13^th’s Jason, and the brain eating corpses from Night of the Living Dead. 

No literary license taken here, just the plain ol’ truth, it was years before the graphic scenes from those movies were expunged from my immediate recall.

Though they no longer haunt me, I can still vividly describe memorable scenes from each. You know, a severed head in the refrigerator, a stake driven through the couple mid coitus, and corpses shouting, “More Brains” before latching onto the scalp of a live victim. 

Even horror movie trailers are taboo for me; they upset my world. No, seriously. Currently in theaters is a movie remake based on Stephen King’s “It.” In a nutshell, it’s about an extremely creepy clown.

In the past, action moviegoers were shown trailers for other action movies. I have no idea when that rule changed, but the trailer for “It” has played at every one of the movies we’ve gone to watch lately. None of the movies even came close to belonging in the horror genre. 

The short clip from, “It” disturbed me so much I had nightmares and scratched a morning run the following day because the scene from my dream happened at the track. Not much frightens me, but since I run before sunrise at a track next to the woods, I’m already hyper vigilante without having to worry about some demonic clown making an appearance. 

Labor Day weekend my husband and I went to see, “The Hit Man’s Bodyguard” with Ryan Reynolds and Samuel L. Jackson.

Excellent movie, but I no doubt looked like a big ‘fraidy cat with my eyes and ears covered during the “It” preview. Why, why, is this trailer being repeatedly forced upon me??

I mean, moviegoers who love horror flicks likely do not want to watch a romantic comedy trailer. After all, isn’t the purpose of previews to introduce viewers to upcoming films within a similar genre? 

With Halloween right around the corner, undoubtedly the number of horror films in theaters will significantly increase. So, if you are planning a scary Halloween movie night with a group of your closest friends, please do not add my name to the list of invitees.

Until Next Time,

Becky J Miller

“Warrior Princess”

Becky J Miller is a contributor and is exclusive to SM Corridor News. You can read more of Becky’s columns in Lifestyle.