Living Outside The Lines: C Stands For Cookie

Cookies are best consumed hot, fresh out of the oven, and with an ice-cold milk chaser. Mmmmm… If I sound like a five year old, it’s because while the rest of me may have grown up…

By, Becky J Miller

Cookies are best consumed hot, fresh out of the oven, and with an ice-cold milk chaser. Mmmmm… If I sound like a five year old, it’s because while the rest of me may have grown up, my taste buds refuse to exchange their love of home baked cookies for say, asparagus (gag).

Baking is a relatively exact science. Anyone with the ability to read and follow directions should be able to use a recipe to produce a palatable treat. “Should” being the operative word. In this world however, there are those who cook, those who bake and those who just eat. I was probably in my late thirties before realizing I definitely am not a, “those who bake.”

Here is the crazy thing; I am particular about almost everything, but the precision required for baking is just annoying. I am acquainted with no one who is able to randomly toss flour, butter, baking soda, salt, sugar, cooking oil and chocolate chips into a bowl with the end result being blue ribbon cookies.

Unlike a pot of chili where one can throw in ground beef, kidney beans, stewed tomatoes, tomato sauce, chopped onion, garlic, chili powder, stir, heat and produce a bowl of steaming deliciousness, with baking, everything must be accurately measured. Who has time for that nonsense?

My brother in law bakes THE BEST chocolate chip cookies. It must be in the DNA because my nieces, all of whom share his gene pool but not mine, are able to bake just like him. Why??? I’m happy he passed the gift along to the next generation, but I simply cannot understand how I could follow the same recipe and not produce a comparable cookie??

Maybe I lost the gene during puberty? I don’t recall my mother doing much baking during my youth, but at one point I baked well enough to win a 4-H Trophy & Blue Ribbon for the Oatmeal Scotchies I made in the Kooky Kookie Kook Off held at the Coastal Carolina Fair in South Carolina, many, many moons ago. Honest, I have the evidence to support my claims.

Realizing my shortcomings, I gave up trying to bake years ago. If I crave homemade cookies I don’t even buy slice and bake, I either go without, or buy the precut squares that can be broken off and tossed on a cookie sheet. Or, before my daughter graduated from college and got her big girl job, I’d just wait for her to come home. She undoubtedly inherited the baking gene from her uncle.

Come to think of it, I’m not the only one who likes to eat cookies baked by someone other than myself. Sesame Street’s Cookie Monster is completely devoted to the subject, and somehow I think he is more eater than baker, but “C” stands for Cookie and that’s good enough for us both!!

Until Next Time,

Becky J Miller ~ Warrior Princess

Becky J Miller is a contributor and is exclusive to SM Corridor News. You can read more of Becky’s columns in Lifestyle.