Living Outside the Lines: “My Sister, My Friend”

We are very different, and I think in our own way, even as children, we sensed that. 

By, Becky J Miller

Siblings share a unique bond, one impossible to replicate in any other relationship.  The DNA ties are as strong as the common experience associated with growing up in the same household.

  Siblings may be polar opposites, or they may be eerily alike in their mannerisms.  You may love them fiercely one minute and despise them the next, but the fact remains, you are forevermore linked together. 

My sister Deann is three and a half years younger than me.  Growing up, I would not say we were close. 

We had moments when we played together peacefully, and much to our parents’ chagrin, we had shouting matches too, but mostly we just stayed out of one another’s way. 

We are very different, and I think in our own way, even as children, we sensed that. 

In my mind at least, she was the naughty one.  Preferring to stay out of trouble, I flew pretty well below the radar. 

One year after she found the super secret Christmas present hiding place, she decided to share her discovery with me.  She persuaded me to take a peek and then after we’d done so, she was overcome with guilt and ratted us out!!!  

Adding insult to injury, she did not even have the foresight to warn me she was going to tattle!

My parents did not like us watching MTV so whenever they left us home alone, my father would deprogram that channel from the television. 

My savvy little sister watched him do it, so she knew how to reprogram the station, and we would watch it in their absence. Although such deception would have never occurred to me alone, I had no problem enjoying the fruits of her labor.  

My sister was only 15 when I got married.  Initially I had not thought to include her in my wedding party, but I was “thoughtful” enough to offer her participation in whatever other manner she saw fit.

I will forever be grateful to our mother for taking me aside and sharing what my sister really desired.  Thirty years later, I still smile when I think of my sister as a bridesmaid in my wedding.

That gesture may have been the turning point in our relationship.  After I married and moved out, she and I spent more time together.  She even traveled to Idaho with my husband and I when we moved there two years later. 

That poor man; 1988 was the year Dirty Dancing was released on all of the movie channels. 

It was showing every single night, in every single hotel we stopped in during that long drive from Texas to Idaho, and I promise you, she and I watched it every opportunity we had.  I’m honestly surprised he doesn’t run screaming from the room at the mere mention of that movie.

Life got busy after we both started our families, but now that the kiddos are all older, it is easier for us to do “sister stuff” together. 

Two years ago she took us on a cruise to Cozumel. 

We danced under the stars with thousands of strangers until we were sweat soaked, held a baby alligator, went four wheelin’ in the mud, snorkeled the beautiful azure waters of Mexico and had an absolutely fabulous time!

Traditionally I travel to Dallas to celebrate her February birthday.  This year though, I’m in the middle of relocation, and life is a bit topsey turvey. 

We do have a Saturday reserved, I just need to find something fabulous to do. 

I like to think I am a daredevil, but truthfully, I’m a bit more daring when I am with her.  She and I learned to waterski together one summer. 

We braved the scary tall grass in Tampa Bay to go scalloping together, and a few years ago when I climbed on the kiddie rides during my dad’s big birthday bash at Ellen’s Fairway, she was right there beside me. 

There is just something about having your sister beside you that makes adventures a little less scary.

My sister drove from Dallas to Austin, and slept at the hospital after I broke my neck in 2011.  Even in my drug induced haze I can vividly recall her being in my hospital room and feeding me because I couldn’t do it myself. 

Our relationship isn’t perfect, we disagree on many subjects, but our love goes deeper than our differences and that is something worth celebrating.  Happy Valentine Birthday, Sis’.  I love you.

Until Next Time,

Becky J Miller

“Warrior Princess”

Becky J Miller is a contributor and is exclusive to SM Corridor News. You can read more of Becky’s columns in Lifestyle.